Had a 12-hour workday today, approximately.
Did not find a lot of opportunities to “look” for Enlightenment.
I performed a piece I was less prepared for than I like to be, and pulled it off.
I refrained from ranting/criticizing when someone I work with made her usual mistakes, despite extra efforts by a few of us to make mistakes less likely.
I can report that despite all of the hours of work and stress of underprepared performance and typical work frustrations, I feel quite lucky, and am generally happy with my lot.
Maybe I’m finding it, even when I’m not looking.
One can hope, I suppose.
There was an Ani line I’m particularly fond of in a song I heard as I was driving in for my third professional task of the day:
I weave each one of my songs out of glass
so you can see me inside of them,
I suppose you could just leave an image of me
in the background, I guess, and
watch your own impression superimposed.
And I thought about how much of what we do, feel, see, think is impacted by so much of what we have done, felt, seen, thought in the past; and how we project those thoughts, feelings, images upon those around us whom we love and care about. A good friend called as I drove home, congratulating me on my performance, and inviting me out for a drink and a chat. I declined, as I have been gone from home for so many days, but I am so grateful for her, my friends, my family, my life.
As Martha would say, It’s all good.