A few questions:

Why is it so difficult to actually live each day the way one means to?

Why is it that I repeatedly do good work and am vilified because I’m not passive enough, not submissive enough, not “friendly” enough?* (I’m actually quite friendly, but only if you are, too.)

How is it that one can have everything one wants, and still have days during which one feels so lost and lonely?

 

“…but nearly is not now, and nearly is not here,
and so for now everything is clearly just the same…

what do people under the gun know?
Tell me how to hurt so it won’t show…”

 

 

*Husband would say it’s misogyny; I guess I either need to learn how to “act my gender” or become a man?

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2 thoughts on “

  1. > Why is it so difficult to actually live each day the way one means to?

    This is a very profound and fundamental question, I think. Presumably this is why the concept of The Devil was invented. People feel a struggle going on within themselves of the nature you describe, and they can’t explain their behaviour as being entirely due to their own choices.

    > How is it that one can have everything one wants, and
    > still have days during which one feels so lost and lonely?

    I guess the answer is that you don’t have everything you want. I reckon some of my most powerful ‘wants’ are things I don’t explicitly recognise as part of me. . . or are an acknowledged part of me and I don’t want them to be but can’t seem to be able to get rid of them.

    I wonder whether feeling ‘lost’ at times isn’t such a bad thing. Does Donald Trump ever feel lost?

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